Through counseling with Brent Curtis, Gary came to realize that there were several characters in his life story who had a profound influence on his heart and life. Gary tells a story that happened when he was 10 years old, and he explains how he made a commitment at the end of that story which would enslave him for years.

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Free Resources

How to Write a Story
The Big Six: What Every Child Needs From Their Parents
Attachment: What It Is and Why It Matters

Show Notes

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7:55 Gary sought out his Dad in elementary school. He knew tennis was the way he could connect with his dad. Asked his dad to teach him to play tennis.
The young boy committed to never play tennis again.
Lesson learned: If you’re not good at something, I don’t want to be with you.
Started a drive in him to be successful.
18:30 I got the message that I will only have relationships when I’m good at something.
20:30 How posture towards the boy at the tennis net has changed over the years.
24:30 Loud voice in his heart – “you idiot.” God brought back times when he would say that to himself as a kid.
God took Gary back to places where he hated that young boy and his own heart because he couldn’t get it right. He said, “Of course no one wanted a relationship with me. I don’t want a relationship with me. I’m an f-ing idiot.”
27:00 Tenderness and honor for himself as a boy. A shift from cursing to blessing.

For help with engaging your story in a group setting, consider the Allender Center’s Certificate Program.

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